I. Beware the lightning that lurketh in an undischarged condenser lest it cause thee to
bounce upon thy buttocks in a most ungentlemanly manner.
II. Cause thou the switch that supplieth large quantities of juice to be opened and
thusly tagged that thy days may be long in the earthly vale of tears.
III. Prove to thyself that all circuits that radiateth and upon which thou worketh are
grounded and thusly tagged lest they lift thee to radio frequency potential and
causeth thee to make like a radiation, too.
IV. Tarry not amongst fools that engage in intentional shocks for they are surely nonbelievers
and are not long for this world.
V. Take care thou useth the proper method when thou taketh the measure of a high
voltage circuit so that thou dost not incinerate both thee and thy testmeter, for
verily, though thou has no account number and can be easily written off, the
testmeter doth have one and as a consequence bringeth much woe unto the
Supervisor.
VI. Take care thou tampereth not with interlocks and safety devices, for this incurreth
the wrath of thy Supervisor and bringeth the fury of Management about thy head
and shoulders.
VII. Work thou not on energized equipment for if thou so doest thy co-workers will surely
be buying beers for thy widow and consoling her in certain other ways not generally
acceptable to thee.
VIII. Verily, verily I say unto thee, never service equipment alone, for electrical cooking is
sometimes a slothful process and thou might sizzle in thine own fat upon a hot
circuit for hours on end before thy Maker sees fit to end thy misery and drag thee
into His fold.
IX. Trifle thou not with radioactive tubes and substances lest thou commence to glow in
the dark like a lightening bug and thy wife be frustrated nightly and have no further
use for thee except for thy wages.
X. Commit thou to memory all the words of the prophets which are written down in the
18th chapter of thy bible, which is the TI Safety Precautions, and which giveth out
with the straight dope and consoleth thee when thou has suffered a ream job by thy Supervisor.
Obtained at Texas Instruments, Dallas Texas, 1983
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